It’s that time of year again. We’ve had the semi finals, it’s now time for the final…
Here’s a quick rundown of the acts tonight, hastily copied and pasted off the Eurovision website…
Sweden Marcus & Martinus Unforgettable
Interesting, the song order is wrong already, I had this down as being last. Oh, great. Oh yes, I seem this one completely breaks the compression with its overly complex graphics. I don’t think I rated this song’s chances last time, and I still don’t. It got through automatically, as Sweden are the hosts, but it’s not very memorable. Of course, they’ve changed the voting now, so you don’t have to vote at the end, but I can’t see them flying in for that one.
Ukraine alyona alyona & Jerry Heil Teresa & Maria
I didn’t l;ike this one much in the semis, it got better as the song went off.. No idea what it’s going on about though. It’s Ukraine though, so it’s probably got a chance, somewhere down the line.
Germany ISAAK Always On The Run
Oh yes, this one is the one that almost sets the set on fire. Not a bad little song to be honest now that I’m hearing it again. It might do well, that one.
Luxembourg TALI Fighter
This one has sound effects in it that sound spookily like a USB device disconnecting, and there’s the Geforce 4 MX leapords again. Glad she got through just so I could see those again.
Israel Eden Golan Hurricane
I really, really liked this one and I’m glad it got through. Apparently, she looks like Dua Lipa, which is Italian for Do a Jump. There’s that subtle piano. I hope this does well.
Lithuania Silvester Belt Luktelk
Did I go to the bog during the semi-final? I can’t remeb… ah yes, it’s this one. Slightly bouncy. I guess that means it didn’t really grip me. Decent beat, sadly instantly forgettable.
Spain Nebulossa ZORRA
I remember this one as being pretty good. Apparently, a portion of the crowd are wearing fox ears because of this song. Apparently, to be a singer, you have to be under 40? I’m not sure how true that is, unless she’s had a hard paper round. I’d like to see it do well. Never really commented on it in the semis as they’re already through.
Estonia 5MIINUST x Puuluup (nendest) narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi
I liked this one in the semis. It’s proper weird, and it has the longest title of any song in the history of Eurovision. Seems to be out of sync though this time.
Ireland Bambie Thug Doomsday Blue
this one is absolutely one of the weirdest things I’ve ever seen at Eurovision? Are they going to tone it down for the final? No. At least it’s different I suppose.
Latvia Dons Hollow
From Ireland to this. Very slow, and I didn’t really “get” it. It’ll probably do well.
Greece Marina Satti ZARI
Oh yes, this is the one that sends the iplayer compression into spasms. A totally forgettable song, and I don’t thunk it’ll get anywhere.
United Kingdom Olly Alexander Dizzy
Ohhhhh no. Ours is complete gargae this year. If we get off the right side of the table tonight I’d be very surprised. Really not a fan. It’s only the 2nd time I’ve heard of it, and I hope it’s the last.
Norway Gåte Ulveham
Oh yes, it’s that hurdy-gurdy thing again. I think I quite liked this one in the semis. I still go. No idea what they’re rabbiting on about. I haven’t learned Norweigan in the space of 2-4 days. Decent tune to it though
Italy Angelina Mango La noia
Apparently sounds like a weird folk song. Oh yes, I remember it now. I think I like it more than I did last time.
Serbia TEYA DORA RAMONDA
Oh, it’s the one with the huge plastic rock. It’;s a slow one, and I don’t think it was up to much. Surprised it got through the first time. I can’t see it doing anything tonight.
Finland Windows95man No Rules!
The staging is absolutely hilarious That’s one of my favourites, definitely. I’d like to see it mdo well.
Portugal iolanda Grito
Wasn’t a fan of this the first time I heard it. I don’t think it’s got any petter the 2nd time.
Armenia LADANIVA Jako
This one’s catchy as hell. I remember, I thought I was going to forget about it, but it was still going through my head several minutes later. I still wouldn’t rush out and buy the CD though.
Cyprus Silia Kapsis Liar
Oh, this was the very first song in the competition, and I thought it sounded generic. I wonder if my thoughts of it have improved now that I’ve heard almost every song swice? Yes, it has. I like it now, and although it’s the first songs, it’s one of the only ones I properly remember.
Switzerland Nemo The Code
Oh yes. It’s the one with the weird spinning disc thing. I liked this one, despite it sounding like something out of The Fifth Element.
Slovenia Raiven Veronika
I think I liked this one? Ah, no. I liked her outfit.
Croatia Baby Lasagna Rim Tim Tagi Dim
Definitely one of the favourites… my me, and by the sounds of it, the crowd too. I’d like to see it do well.
Georgia Nutsa Buzaladze Firefighter
I liked this one at the time, but it sounds a little generic next to Baby Lasagna.
France Slimane Mon amour
Can’t say I was really a fan, but the singer has a fair set of lungs on him. It might do well.
Austria Kaleen We Will Rave
Yep, I remember liking this one, and I still do. Sounds like something that should have been popular in the 1990s though.
Aaaaaaaand, that’s your lot. 25 songs, because there was a disqualified team. Not sure why. Probably something political. Oh, it was the one that looked like Jimmy Savile. Never mind, eh? Well, there’s been a half time show. Abba didn’t appear, except in the firm of avatars. Hugely disappointing. Now, onto the votes…